How Do I Boost My Confidence And Change My Personality?

when i was in primary school i used to think i was pretty and used to do what i wanted where i wanted when i wanted and with who i wanted i used to be realy popular but then i got to secondary school and all of a sudden i lost my confidence i couldnt talk to people unless i knew them when im around people i havent known for long im quiet please help me get my confidence back .xHow Do I Boost My Confidence And Change My Personality?
Hi Tasha. You may find more answers if you post your question in another section (this part of the site is about reading and writing books). But I'll try to answer your question based on my experience.



Change can be difficult at any age. You left primary school where you had grown comfortable and confident, and then you were thrown in to secondary school with new kinds of pressure (both from school and friends), maybe some new people, definitely new expectations for you to live up to. All that will absolutely take some time to adjust to. That's perfectly natural.



First, there's a difference between being popular and being self-confident:



Being popular means that other people like you.



Being self-confident means that you like you.



The good news is that being 'popular' doesn't actually means anything at all - the way that people feel about you has everything to do with them, and almost nothing to do with you. (Have you noticed that people who are more insecure tend to be meaner? They're not mean because they don't like the other person; they're mean because they're insecure themselves.)



Self-confidence is much more fulfilling and much more REAL. It's what YOU think of YOURSELF. That has nothing to do with how pretty you are or how much other people like you. It has to do with how you treat yourself and other people. Do you follow your own values (things like honesty, keeping promises, being courteous and kind, etc.)? Do you respect yourself for the decisions that you make?



Consider this: every single moment, you are making a choice, whether you realize it or not. And the choices you make help shape your relationship with yourself - which is the most important relationship you will ever have in your life.



So if you want to raise your self-confidence, become aware of the choices that you make every moment and begin to choose them consciously. If you are standing next to someone whom you would like to speak to, even if you're nervous and don't know them well, just once make the choice to speak to them even if you're nervous. If you have the choice to say something nice about someone instead of saying something mean (even if it's more fun to say something mean), choose to say something nice. That way, you'll come to think of yourself as someone who says nice things about others, even if they don't like them. Doesn't that sound like someone you'd like to be?



If you really want to have a wonderful life full of self-confidence, make the choice to enjoy yourself and not worry too much about what anyone else thinks. This life is your golden coin - spend it exactly how YOU want to. That will make you the most self-confident person in the world.



Have a bright, positive, happy life!

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