2 year old DD personality change since having a new baby?

WE have 2 wonderful beautiful childern DD 2yo(28 months) and DS 11 days old. But our DD is not adjusting well to the new addition. She has been acting like a tyrant. She is constantly screaming, throwing fits and every other word from her is NO. While the baby sleeps she will be in the same room but as soon as he wakes she will leave the room and hide or throw a tantrum. We have tried spending more time with her and telling her how we love her and how the baby loves her too. But she just keeps up the same behavior she has even told me that I don't love her. She is doing things she would have never done in the past like putting some things in her mouth, trying to wander outside by herself, ect. This whole thing is breaking my heart and sometimes I feel guilty. We know she loves him but we think she is afraid to show it. Please someone giveme some advice on how I can stop this behavior because I think I will go crazy if it doesn't end soon. Thanks in advance2 year old DD personality change since having a new baby?
My daughter was 22 months when we brought our new baby home. She was quite upset at this new addition, it lasted about 1 month or so and every day it got better. I noticed that whenever someone would come to see the new baby everyone fussed over the new baby instead of our oldest and she was always the centre of attention, so I made a point of asking our guests to say hello to our oldest daughter first before fussing too much over the baby.



I also included our oldest daughter in everything, from feeding to changing. If I was changing the baby, I would ask my oldest to open the diaper for her sister and say things like ';wow, you are the best big sister ever'; and she would be very happy with herself and very proud of herself. After about a week, she would actually tell people ';do you want to meet my little sister';, we would always make a point of spending a lot more time with our oldest daughter.



it is tough, but it was so rewarding. My oldest is now almost 3 and the baby just turned one and they are inseparable. The oldest is always asking for her little sister, and when she wakes up in the morning she goes straight into her sisters room - she use to come and see us :)



I felt guilty in the beginning, but I feel SO much better and happier. the first time you see the oldest one, hug or kiss the little one you will cry your eyes out - it is beautiful to see.



Don't feel bad - feel free to contact me anytime as I have seen it all. I don't think she is doing it to be bad or misbehave I think she may actually be upset or confused over the situation. Instead of paying attention to her behaviour try to redirect it, instead of asking why she is hiding or sulking say something like ';we are going to change the baby I can't do it without your help, you are the big sister and your little brother needs you';.



Good luck and congrats on your new addition.2 year old DD personality change since having a new baby?
My mom ';gave'; me to my brother. He got to help out a lot with ';his'; baby. He got to help feed me and play with me and hold me and he was only 2 1/2 when i came around. You just have to make it more fun for her to have new baby there. THe more you play into her sudden behaviour the more she wins because she is getting the attention she wants. She doesn't care if it is positive attention or negative attention as long as it's attention. Don't play her game.



I've also heard of people throwing a party for the older sibling to celebrate them becoming a big brother/big sister...none of the attention was given to the baby...only the older one...it supposed to help them adjust with the sudden loss of some of the attention.
I can't really give much advice on how to stop the behaviour other than be consistent and firm. Let her help you as much as possible and let her have time to hold him while she is sitting on the sofa (with your help!). When he smiles say 'look he is smilling specially for his big sister'. I have 2 children with the same age gap, my son is now 5 and my daughter is 2, it all seems like a distant memory but I remember it well. You feel guilty, different feelings of love for both, anger and then guilt and you start thinking that life as you knew it is well and truly over and you will never get your child back.

Thankfully none of it is true, it takes a while for everyone to adjust to the new baby but eventually things will settle down and you too will feel like this is all just a distant memory. Who knows you might be able to say the same thing to someone else in 2 years.

Take care!